Dr Mumbo

Hamish & Andy on the art of contract negotiation

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Hamish and Andy in 2009

And so to the Australian Commercial Radio Awards (ACRAs) where the talk of the night was the continued speculation around radio duo Hamish and Andy’s future with Southern Cross Austereo next year.

Indeed it was the pair themselves, also the hosts for the night, who fuelled that speculation confirming to the ballroom of 1,200 people in Melbourne that they were indeed in negotiations but that they had a few demands.

They then produced what appeared to be a phonebook titled “Hamish and Andy’s contract demands” with Blake declaring, tongue firmly in cheek, “these all have to be met.”

Demand one: “Southern Cross Austereo undertakes to organise for everyone in Australia to now get up at midday and the Australian work day to start at 2pm at the earliest.” With Lee declaring “if that happens then we’ll do breakfast.”

Demand two: “If we are signed to 2DayFM, the Sydney hit music station, then we require the entire building to be moved to our hometown of Melbourne.”

Blake told the audience “you get those trucks and move them down where I am.”

Demand three: “Andy gets twice as many sick days as Kyle (Sandilands) gets in his contract at Kiis. Management must understand that this may mean Andy does not show up for work for three years straight.”

Demand four: “All live reads are to be done by siri and at the end there is just a prerecorded message saying we agree.”

Demand five: “The 30 second delay we currently have at SCA must be extended to a 30 day delay. So Andy and I can do our show then go off to our yacht and think about if there is any part of that show we would like to dump.”

Blake added: “A new demand is that it has to be Lachlan Murdoch’s yacht and that SCA must buy it off him immediately.”

Other requests included John Laws as “our news reader and gossip dude” and the “the radio show cannot interfere with Andy’s television commitments as next year’s The Bachelor.”

It’s quite a list but Dr Mumbo hears that SCA is in fact moving heaven and earth to get the pair, and while they probably won’t be moving the Australian workday, the reports that the duo are being offered a deal worth $5m each over three years are wrong and that the real figure is more like $5m each per year.

Expect an announcement very soon.

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