Dr Mumbo is most grateful to the good people of Pedestrian TV for creating this handy ready-to-rant guide for aggrieved consumers needing to vent spleen on Facebook.
Dear Facebook page of Corporation I have a grievance with,
As a person who owns a social media account I’d like to make a detailed passive-aggressive comment about your actions that I have a strong non-expert opinion on.
THIS IS A DIVISIVE OR INCENDIARY STATEMENT THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO IGNORE!
The non-threatening and probably recreational-associated problem I’m writing about has impacted my life to such a degree that I’m willing to spend 3-4 minutes of said life to construct this diatribe against it.
I will use “excessive” amounts of “quotation marks” to take anything you have previously said out of context, and for the purpose of sarcasm.
Here I make an assertion that whatever my complaint pertains to is in some way related to the downfall of society in general.
I write this in the confidence that it will generate enough Likes that this message itself will warrant its own media story.
The Entire Population Of Planet Earth
PS This is a straw man argument hidden by passionate conviction!
Dr Mumbo feels a similar version could be drafted for media outlets to respond with…