An open letter to management: Being OK starts with culture
PHD's Chloe Hooper has had a hard start to R U OK day. Here, she reflects on how company culture can empower staff to take the mental health day they need.
It’s 8.46am on the morning of R U OK day, and I’ve already spoken to three people with mental health issues. First, the morning phone call from my mum, who hasn’t left the house for ten months due to deep depression and bipolar, second, a call from my partner, who has suffered from anxiety his whole life, and thirdly, popping upstairs to check on my housemate, who has been off sick the last two days with mental health issues.
It was this third conversation that I found most disturbing. I looked into her eyes, and could tell she wasn’t ready to go back to work today. I insisted that the best thing she could do was take another day to look after her mental wellbeing. I knew if I were feeling as terrible as she was there is no way I would be expected to go to work. She replied, “it’s fine for you Chloe, you can do that, I have to go in.”
On my journey into work, I reflected on what she had said. She was right, I could do that. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that I couldn’t take ‘a mental health day’.
But where had I got this sense of freedom and found the courage to put myself first? I wasn’t always like this, I grew up with the mindset of no matter what was wrong you pulled yourself out of bed and got yourself into school or work or wherever else you were expected to be that day.
This morning, my housemate has opened my eyes to the impact my company culture has had on me as a person and I wanted to write this article to share how work has given me this strength.
It’s not that we have ‘mental health policies and procedures’… at least, I don’t think we do. It’s more the sense of empowerment that is instilled into us.
So, if there are no set policies and procedures, what has created this?
You will often see mums and dads quite openly declare that they are ‘leaving early’, or ‘won’t be in until later tomorrow’ because their child is in a play or has a piano recital. When I first joined PHD four years ago, I remember being in shock about how vocal people were about this, they don’t sneak out the door they say it proud with a sense of achievement.
There also isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t have someone’s child filling a desk or someone’s dog taking pride of place on a chair. This sense of family makes work feel more like home. I think small things like this are the demonstration you need of the importance of work-life balance, beyond any policy that can be implemented.
Every ‘careers’ page says something along the lines of ‘we CARE about our staff’. But what does this actually mean? For me, the proof point is ‘what comes first’. If someone has a problem personal or work-related, I know that our natural reaction is to stop. Pitch or no pitch, we stop and take time to talk to that person and try and help them resolve how they are feeling.
Even if there is nothing that can be done, they have the opportunity to share what is happening and not feel like the work is the number one priority. If you need to leave, there is always someone who can stand in and cover what you needed to do, and you are happy to take on additional work to help someone out because you know they would do the same for you.
Two types of visible vulnerability create a culture where mental health is ok to talk about in the workplace.
Personal
Senior leadership sharing their troubles with the wider agency is important for ensuring everyone knows and appreciates everyone is human. A bit like teachers at school, they gain your trust through sharing parts of them you don’t expect to see. I know that having an awareness of seniors personal troubles makes it a lot easier to open up.
Professional
Knowing you don’t have to be perfect. As a leadership team, we made a promise at our last away day. To always be the person asking the most stupid question in the room. Showing this vulnerability signifies to your wider team that its ok not to have all the answers.
This is my open letter to senior management everywhere as a call to action to instil a culture in which people don’t think twice about looking after their mental health. This comes from leading by example; make sure you are looking after yourself, as by doing that, you are setting an example to everyone around you.
Chloe Hooper is the national new business and marketing director at PHD.
Good on you Chloe! You go girl. Its high time this industry talked about this subject. Strongest of us humans are vulnerable to mental issues. Unfortunately, some companies and people still don’t think its important. Love you heaps. Big Hug from me.
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Well done Chloe. So proud of you for writing this article. Honest and brave.
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Great work Chloe. Love your authenticity and honesty. we spend so much time at work, its in a businesses best interest to build a culture where people can feel genuinely supported and have the freedom to be vulnerable.
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Or you have an employer that puts up the ‘R U OK?’ signs everywhere, but is often the person contributing to the stress and/or mental health issues in the workplace. Its a bit hard to say ‘im depressed because you give me no shifts and i am broke and when i am at work i get treated like my work is never good enough’
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Title says it all. If management is saying “Are you ok? Good now I’ve ticked that off can I have you stay for an unhealthy amount of unpaid overtime?” Then its not a worthwhile activity.
What confused me sometimes is that pretty much every study shows more hours = less productivity. So stressing out your staff is all negative/no winners. Yet its common. Weird.
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With respect to Chloe and to potential howls of derision let me give a perspective anonymously.
Having people in your life who have depression and anxiety doesnt mean you know whats good for them.
I have it. I have been bipolar all my life as a result of trauma. You dont catch these things.
I carved a swathe of carnage, hurt and lies through the recklessness that mental health can cause.
It was my behaviour..however altered and endowed, that was to blame.
Ultimately i had to take personal responsibility to seek help myselfand get better, get medicated (which isnt always great) and confront it.
RUOK is great…but for someone who isnt ok..it can be confronting shaming and marginalizing.
We dont need to normalise mental health. We need to let people handle it their own way. Not trivialize it. Not intervene as helpful amateurs.
It is very very personal. It is very very sensitive. And it is only my opinion, but it is something that should be quietly acknowledged by our society and “culture” but kept private.
Chloe your empathy to people you care about is the reason they are lucky to have your support.
But it is for them to solve. You can enable.
But it is for them to confront. And believe me it is fucking tough.
It is not for the workplace to reconcile. And not for you to either.
Sorry.
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Sadly the trolls on Mumbrella proclude me from giving my name, but I wish I’d worked with more people like you. Thanks for writing this. And keep caring for the people around you, you seem a good person.
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You’ve eloquently summed up the concern I have with R U OK day. The helpful, unqualified amateur, with the best of intentions – and the intrusive and shaming nature of being asked.
Thank you.
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I agree about the intrusive nature but there’s no one size fits all for dealing with mental health. Not everyone gets to the point where they even realise they have a problem let alone identify a need for seeking help. R U OK has its issues but it may help some take that first step.
Thanks for writing this Chloe. I’m sure a lot of senior leaders get on board with initiatives such as R U OK but scoff at the idea of their staff taking a mental health day. They’re the same ones who still walk around the office at 7pm to check who is at their desk.
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Thank you Chloe, for having the courage and vulnerability to share this incredibly important message. I couldn’t agree with it more! Let’s have leaders LEAD by example and put into practice the CARE that companies claim to offer their staff.
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I once worked at an agency that had sold to a holding company and were heading towards a multiples payout. Subsequently, they chose to be ridiculously under-resourced and pitched for anything and everything. It was quite normal to be working until 10pm overnight and at least one day of the weekend (actually, inside the office on some Saturdays, you could swear it was Monday, judging by the amount of people working).
You know what their solution was?- to provide people with a brochure and phone number to support services.
They didn’t want to address the actual problem of running an under-resourced, mismanaged business. Unfortunately, a hell of a lot of agencies run on this faulty business model.
And agencies wonder why nobody wants to work in them anymore. Really?
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@ I Am Sorry: this is true to my experience as well.
I’ve sacrificed a lot over the years on the altar of mental health, and am grateful for the heartfelt support I’ve received. No buts.
I’ve learned that empathy is a double-edge sword. There is a very big difference between good intentions and the ability to make a difference.
The impression I get is that R U OK Day seems to be predicated on the belief that just talking about these problems makes it better.
As a friend posted yesterday, what happens on R U OK Day when someone says no? In my experience, in the vast majority of cases, seven shades of fuck-all happens. Which makes it worse. But the fact is, it’s not fair to expect it to be any different.
Even mental health professionals struggle mightily to make even a small dent in an individual’s very specific, very personal plight. Why should we think a casual acquaintance could do a better job?
Boot-strapping it is a way of life. A compassionate workplace helps, but it barely scratches the surface of the underlying issues. Umbrellas are pretty useless in a hurricane.
I’m sorry that you’ve had such a tough personal journey with mental health. I don’t think Chloe was suggesting that workplaces take responsibility for solving people’s mental health problems. She’s not even suggesting that workplaces go around asking ‘R U Ok?’
Instead she was suggesting that a workplace culture can help people feel empowered to look after themselves and have the time/space needed to deal with mental health issues.
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This ^ 100%
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Firstly Chloe good for you for having the guts to do what you did. To all other contributors and their respective commentary good for you all, for taking the time to write. No one is right or wrong on society’s greatest health challenge, because that’s what it is. 1 in 4 from teen upwards suffers from a form of mental health challenges. Note teen upwards.
Mental health does not discriminate on age, sex, wealth or poverty, colour of skin insert words here. As a sufferer for way too many decades to count do yourself a favour and go to you tube and search black dog institute. There is a simple video that explains at least the surface. Don’t google do i suffer from mental illness so take affirmative action and seek professional help from a qualified practitioner.
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It’s a bit like a motivational poster in a boardroom, which says ‘teamwork’ or ‘collaboration’, when the processes in the company do not incentivise either, at all…
Respect plays a big part. If everyone truly respects each other a culture can blossom and work will get done ANNND – people will look out for each other.
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